Relationships
Why does it seems that most of my friends have relationship problems? Are they looking to hard for the right person, can't stand spending time alone, or just plan set in their ways for anyone else opinion to mater? I ask myself this question when I'm the ear to a friend who is really going through it. I once had a buddy of mine tell me "I've never gone more then two weeks without being in a relationship". I looked at them, shook my head, and was like "what the HELL"....
Someone sent me an email the other day with this writing on "someone to love", and it really hit home. Tell me what you think?
KD
Someone 2 Love
"You have the power to create. Your power is so strong that whatever you believe comes true. Your whole reality, everything you believe, is your creation." ~The Mastery of Love, Don Miguel RuizAnd so I'm back, from outer space.Man, oh man, oh man. Let's just say it's been weird. With that said (and no real explanation for being gone) let's jump into it.Okay, relationships. Got one? Want one? Been in one? Does it work? What makes them work? Why didn't it work? All of these questions come as I examine the art of relationships with special emphasis on male/male unions. Recently I've been asking people I come into contact with how many of their friends are in a relationship. Not just a relationship, but a functional (as far as you can tell) "healthy" relationship.
And I am not at all surprised by the answers. Most people I've queried know at least three people in a relationship. Which initially sounds good until I hit them with: "and this is out of how many friends/acquaintances?" And then the numbers shrink, drastically.Nearly 90% of my friends are single. Single and looking. Single and not looking. Single and waiting, for someone or something to come along and as Aretha sung Rescue Me. Most maintain they're happy being single, some admit their frustrations in finding someone suitable to love, and then there are those who are just having fun. But all of them when prompted readily admit if they had it their way, they'd surely have someone in their life. So what's the problem? Well, since you asked...(1) Options. In this day of hit and run, internet connect, we fuck before we know each other's names, it's no wonder settling down is so friggin' arduous.(2) Patience. Who has the time to get to know each other? Better yet, who wants to? Is there even a such thing as dating anymore? And does this take place before or after the fuck?(3) Realism. He has to look like this, believe in this, speak like this, cater to my needs, never show aggression or weakness or fear or pretense or anything remotely human whatsoever---or, I'm out.And while some of you may think I'm way off the mark I'm almost certain the majority of you will agree wholeheartedly because you've been there, done that. And while those are contributing factors the main reason so many of my friends (and yours) are single is due to a lack of community support for relationships. In all honesty, who wants to be in a relationship when you've got sites like Adam4Adam offering up free trade on daily basis? I mean come on! Being single is a luxury in this lifestyle--especially when its bundled with youth! Add in a dose of masculinity, a decent body and a sizable member and you've hit the motherfuckin' jackpot! Hot damn ho here I go again... These are the things our community covets. These are the things that we seek, and ultimately, these are the things we find.We need to re-boot our community. We need to re-examine our priorities. We need to stop looking at ourselves as profiles, types and potential fuck buddies if we are ever to attain that which we desire. Just saying you want a relationship doesn't help materialize one. When we realize this and admit to ourselves that we are our own worst enemy, and that it is our bad habits that stands between love and lust, our search for someone to love will become a thing of the past. Because when you give love, you get love...abundantly.
Why does it seems that most of my friends have relationship problems? Are they looking to hard for the right person, can't stand spending time alone, or just plan set in their ways for anyone else opinion to mater? I ask myself this question when I'm the ear to a friend who is really going through it. I once had a buddy of mine tell me "I've never gone more then two weeks without being in a relationship". I looked at them, shook my head, and was like "what the HELL"....
Someone sent me an email the other day with this writing on "someone to love", and it really hit home. Tell me what you think?
KD
Someone 2 Love
"You have the power to create. Your power is so strong that whatever you believe comes true. Your whole reality, everything you believe, is your creation." ~The Mastery of Love, Don Miguel RuizAnd so I'm back, from outer space.Man, oh man, oh man. Let's just say it's been weird. With that said (and no real explanation for being gone) let's jump into it.Okay, relationships. Got one? Want one? Been in one? Does it work? What makes them work? Why didn't it work? All of these questions come as I examine the art of relationships with special emphasis on male/male unions. Recently I've been asking people I come into contact with how many of their friends are in a relationship. Not just a relationship, but a functional (as far as you can tell) "healthy" relationship.
And I am not at all surprised by the answers. Most people I've queried know at least three people in a relationship. Which initially sounds good until I hit them with: "and this is out of how many friends/acquaintances?" And then the numbers shrink, drastically.Nearly 90% of my friends are single. Single and looking. Single and not looking. Single and waiting, for someone or something to come along and as Aretha sung Rescue Me. Most maintain they're happy being single, some admit their frustrations in finding someone suitable to love, and then there are those who are just having fun. But all of them when prompted readily admit if they had it their way, they'd surely have someone in their life. So what's the problem? Well, since you asked...(1) Options. In this day of hit and run, internet connect, we fuck before we know each other's names, it's no wonder settling down is so friggin' arduous.(2) Patience. Who has the time to get to know each other? Better yet, who wants to? Is there even a such thing as dating anymore? And does this take place before or after the fuck?(3) Realism. He has to look like this, believe in this, speak like this, cater to my needs, never show aggression or weakness or fear or pretense or anything remotely human whatsoever---or, I'm out.And while some of you may think I'm way off the mark I'm almost certain the majority of you will agree wholeheartedly because you've been there, done that. And while those are contributing factors the main reason so many of my friends (and yours) are single is due to a lack of community support for relationships. In all honesty, who wants to be in a relationship when you've got sites like Adam4Adam offering up free trade on daily basis? I mean come on! Being single is a luxury in this lifestyle--especially when its bundled with youth! Add in a dose of masculinity, a decent body and a sizable member and you've hit the motherfuckin' jackpot! Hot damn ho here I go again... These are the things our community covets. These are the things that we seek, and ultimately, these are the things we find.We need to re-boot our community. We need to re-examine our priorities. We need to stop looking at ourselves as profiles, types and potential fuck buddies if we are ever to attain that which we desire. Just saying you want a relationship doesn't help materialize one. When we realize this and admit to ourselves that we are our own worst enemy, and that it is our bad habits that stands between love and lust, our search for someone to love will become a thing of the past. Because when you give love, you get love...abundantly.
posted by KneeDeep at 1:39 PM
2 Comments:
hmmmmmmmmm interesting and offers some great points, but i think a missing point is WHY these men search for decadent sex on the internet .... a lot of them, especially blacks and Latins, are socialized to believe they are damned to hell. so if they feel that way why would a relationship last or be healthy? Therefore, they get involved in these circumstances because they feel like they are not worthy of anything else.
How can anyone condense their lives into a short paragraph. It's getting to know a person one on one that make it special. But first that all important connection. I guess it would be easier if we were all mindreaders. Oh, for simplicity. Have a great one. Love your blog posts. A new fan.
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